Oh Full House, why didn’t I question you as a child?

Most nights while sitting and watching television, I inevitably end up watching an episode or two or Full House. Okay, so maybe it’s more like three or four, sue me. (And usually follow it with two hours of Friends as I doze off to sleep.)

What I never realized was how many things are wrong with the show. I’m writing this from my iPad now, while watching the episode called Happy Birthday Babies (Season 5 Episode 10, from November 12th, 1991). It’s the one where Rebecca has the twins (which if you’re following along at home and aren’t a moron, means those twins have been old enough to legally drink for over a year now). This particular episode has a ton of flaws, most notably when Jesse says he’s having sympathy pains for Rebecca’s pregnancy.

The doctor (an Ob/gyn) touches his stomach for two, maybe three, seconds and diagnoses him as needing his appendix removed. They whisk him away, and separate him from Rebecca while she’s in labor.

Normally diagnosing someone with anything takes more than a second of touching, doesn’t it?

Now we’ve moved on to Danny bringing in the camera crew to film Rebecca being in labor for Jesse, since he’s missing it. Like a hospital would let in a camera crew?

Onto the next scene — Danny is in the delivery room with Rebecca. In bursts Joey (the unfunniest person on television in the ’90s) wheeling Jesse in on a bed, so he can be there when the twins are born. No sterilization. No hair cap. No scrubbing in. They just stroll him right in, and deliver a couple of kids. Just like that, magic.

One of the other things I never noticed, but is clear now in my adult life? (I haven’t verified this yet, but I plan to eventually re-watch all of the episodes to confirm.) Danny kisses Michelle on the head or face in every episode. I noticed this a few weeks back, and have been watching for it since. It’s almost a given. And kind of creepy knowing all the sexual jokes that Bob Saget makes about the Olsen twins in his stand-up routine.

Cut back to this episode: Jesse and Rebecca are now laying in bed together with the twins. A king sized bed. In a hospital. Like that ever happens.

I don’t know why I’m so obsessed with Full House. On its face, it’s not really that great of a show, is it? I suppose it’s because of the nostalgia factor that people from my generation have for shows that we’re once part of TGIF. (Re-reading that makes me sound old and crotchety, sorry.) I think everyone my age that watched TGIF loves Full House, and Boy Meets World. Does anyone really miss Family Matters, though? Does that make us partially racist?

Now I’m curious what other shows were on TGIF. According to Wikipedia, TGIF debuted Friday September 22nd, 1989. Just a week before my tenth birthday. The original lineup was:

  • Perfect Strangers
  • Full House
  • Mr. Belvedere
  • Just The Ten of Us

It wasn’t until a few years later that Family Matters showed up (’90-’91). This article on Wikipedia also details quite a few shows that I don’t even remember, such as: Baby Talk, Billy, Going Places, Where I Live, On Our Own, You Wish. Am I alone there, or do you remember any of those?

Though the lineup over the years mostly had some shows that our generation loves, there were certainly some duds. I think the issues started when those of us that started watching this great Friday night lineup grew up, and were no longer home on Friday nights to watch. Wikipedia also reports that ABC has tried to reboot TGIF two more times since its original debut in 1989.

And thus concludes tonight’s lesson on Full House, TGIF and making you feel old. You’re welcome.

Editor’s note: Sorry for the typos. Autocorrect got the best of me. ¬†Double note: this was my first post from the WordPress iPad app. It did quite a nice job.

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